Do you ever feel like you’re not satisfying your wife or girlfriend?
I’ve been there too.
You finish having sex…roll over…and instead of enjoying post-coital bliss, she’s on her phone.
She could be texting her friends about how bad the sex was, or even worse, texting another man.
If you want to rock her world, here’s what women want in bed.
#1 – Who’s the Boss?
Now I’m not going to get all science-y in this one, but women want an alpha male.
They want a man who is confident, dominant, and always ready to lead her.
They want a man who will protect her and the children, and fight off anyone who threatens the family.
So, how do you confirm that you’re an alpha male while you’re doing the dirty? Assert dominance, by…
-Treating her rough
Basically, do whatever the heck you wanna do, with no regard for what she wants.
…okay maybe that’s a little too far, but it’s true. Women like men who do what they want, so if you’re asking her every few minutes…
“is this okay?”
“can I change position?”
“do you like that?”
She’ll be disgusted by your neediness. Instead, do what you want, and be dominant during sex.
#2 – Quality Time with Your Cock
This one goes without saying, but it’s crucial that you last long in bed.
There’s no set minimum, but in my years of working in the porn industry, I’ve learned that MOST women can’t orgasm unless there are at least ten minutes of sex.
There’s a lot going on with the female orgasm, which we’ll talk about later, but just know that time is the crucial factor when it comes to women. Guys, we enjoy pretty much everything, but women need certain stimulation to get to that “WOW” orgasm.
You have to find which technique, position, or stimulation will get them to orgasm. To do this, you have to be able to have sex for enough time to get her there.
If you can’t last that long, click here, but you can also increase the duration of foreplay…
#3 – The One Thing Porn Videos Get Wrong
Here’s another thing men get wrong about sex.
Men…you know how it is…we can get a boner anytime. You know when you’re just sitting there, minding your own business, and then you suddenly have an erection?
Yeah, me too, so much that my friends and I have a term for this, NRB’s, aka “No Reason Boners.”
Men get aroused extremely easily. Women, on the other hand, need to be warmed up a little bit.
They need foreplay.
She has to get her body ready to have sex…so that there’s proper lubrication…but she also has to prepare her MIND to accept your penis.
She could get pregnant, so her body needs to make sure you’re the right guy.
That’s where foreplay comes in. Foreplay is where you confirm in her mind and body that sex is a good decision.
Everybody knows what foreplay is, but most don’t know how to do it. It’s hard to describe without showing you, so my one foreplay tip for now is:
When you spend more TIME doing something, you naturally put in more EFFORT to keep it interesting.
So, instead of worrying about kissing the right spot on her body, focus on taking your time. For example, when taking her shirt off, do you simply take it off?
Or…do you take your time and tug at the collar, kiss her collarbone, slowly remove the shirt, kiss her ribcage, then bury your head in her chest before going for the bra…….
…alright that’s enough foreplay…I’m getting too aroused to write. Let’s move on!
#4 – Why She Really Wants YOUR Sex
I’m gonna be all lovey-dovey for a few minutes…or at least as romantic as an ex-pornstar can…
Women want to feel a connection with their partner. Even if it’s just for a one night stand, women want to feel like they are doing the right thing by sleeping with you.
The way you confirm their decision is by building a connection with them while you’re having sex. You want to finish having sex, look in her eyes, and FEEL like your souls are closer to each other.
You have to use sex to increase the connection between you and her.
I get it, you work long hours, and she’s busy with the kids, but sex should be an event that brings you two together. The honeymoon might be over, but sex is what ultimately makes you a couple.
To build connection, maintain eye contact, to really relate on a spiritual level. I don’t know what it is, but looking deep into someone’s eyes brings people together like crazy.
You can also talk about how great she looks but in a sexual manner.
Tell her how much you like parts of her body.
They love this, next time she looks in the mirror, she’ll think “oh yeah…I’m sexy.”
#5 – Shock Her with These Moves
Variety is the spice of life.
Sex is one of the most amazing activities that we can partake in. It can also be one of the most boring.
Unfortunately, the average Joe falls into the boring category. His sex techniques are either:
- Missionary position for 5 minutes to completion
- Random jackhammering they saw in porno videos
Women have short attention spans, and thanks to smartphones, their attention spans are even shorter.
They get bored very easily, and if your sex sounds like a broken record to them, they’ll get bored and move onto the next guy. To keep the sex interesting, you have to do something weird…wacky…inspiring.
It doesn’t matter if you don’t like doing new things, for the sake of your sex life, you should introduce a little kink into your sex life. This can be done in millions of ways, but you want to do things she’s never done before. You want to push her limits, wherever they are.
You can start by simple physical acts like biting her neck or licking the inside of her ear (hey some women love it). When you’re ready to take it to the next level, here’s how you really build novelty in the bedroom:
-New positions (besides missionary, doggystyle, and cowgirl…yawn)
-Using a sex pillow (worth the investment)
-Toys (vibrators, cock rings, dildos)
-Light BDSM (handcuffs, rope, blindfolds)
-Taking it off the bed and onto the floor, shower, couch, or countertop
-Taking it outside the house and into a public area you might get caught
-Anal (if she’s really down to get freaky)
You get my point. It doesn’t have to be a huge part of the sex, but you should have some kink in your sex toolkit, to break out at any time.
Introducing danger or novelty into sex will definitely leave fond memories in her mind….then she’ll gossip to her girlfriends…and keep coming back for more.
#6 – The “O” Word Women Love
Yes, yes, the moment you were all waiting for. You know I was going to mention it, well here it is.
The truth is, a female orgasm is necessary for sex.
Some guys think it’s unnecessary because getting ourselves off is most important, but let me tell you…once you have a woman CRAVING the orgasms that only YOUR COCK can give her, that woman will be wrapped around your finger!
The problem is that there are actually 5 types of female orgasms, based on all of the areas in the erogenous zones in the vagina.
Women don’t know this, they never take the time to learn the parts, and women masturbate less than men, so they never really figure out all of their parts. Even out of the ones who masturbate, their sex drive isn’t half as strong as ours, so they don’t crave orgasm as much as we do.
When you combine the fact that women don’t fully understand what needs to be done, PLUS guys don’t know where her exact anatomy is…no wonder female orgasm doesn’t happen 100% of the time.
You’ll notice this is farther down the list. That’s by design. Although getting your partner to orgasm is important, I don’t think it’s critical for sex.
What I do think is important is for you to use all the other tips here to create a great sexual experience for both of you.
A byproduct of good sex is making her orgasm. By the nature of having sex in different positions/situations/etc., you’ll organically find what makes her cum.
As you’re inside of her, when she starts being noticeably more vocal, ask her “oh you like that don’t you?” and judge her response.
If you go down on her and find out that one certain spot makes her wiggle in ecstasy, congrats you’ve found her clitoris.
Since you’re able to have sex for 20-30 minutes, you have plenty of time to bang different ways, lick every crevice of her pussy, and find that sweet spot that’ll make her mouth go “O.”
If you still can’t make her orgasm, you might want to check this article out.
#7 – Rock the Boat like a Captain
Like I was talking about before, most guys have boring sex skills, copying from whatever porno’s they’ve watched in the past few days.
This doesn’t work, unfortunately, because one tempo, position, or stroke will not satisfy the other requirements on this list. You need to have a grasp on rhythm and how it affects sex.
Rhythm is important for novelty.
If all you do is pound away for 20 minutes, there’s no variety or difference in anything you do for the entire sex session. Instead, you can slow down your pace to change the sensation.
You can move your body, penetrate her at a different angle, and stimulate different nerves in her pussy. This’ll create great experiences for both of you.
Rhythm is important for getting a woman to orgasm because you need to find out where her g spot is, or which position correctly stimulates her clit.
These two areas, as we discussed above, are tiny. Some women might be keyed into where their spots are, but if they don’t know, how the heck are you going to find out?
To get a woman to orgasm you have to try penetrating her from different angles, positions, speeds, altitudes, lubrication, everything. It’s not easy to do, so you gotta pull out every trick in the book to get her to orgasm.
You can start improving your rhythm by being conscious of it.
Once you recognize that rhythm is important for sex, you start to think about it while you’re having sex.
Over time, this consciousness will manifest itself in your actions, and you’ll be changing gears from…slow stroke Casanova…into….jackhammer pornstar.
In conclusion, there are a million ways to create pleasurable sex. Instead of trying to do EVERYTHING, focus on these aspects every time you have sex. If you try to improve on one of these areas each time you have sex, your skills will develop and turn you into a sex god.